Further to our daytime gallivants around the Shri Swaminarayan (I'm getting pretty good at spelling that without looking it up now) and Tate Modern, Denzil and I proceed to O'Neills bar in Soho where we liaise with my friend Gemma for the Point and Laugh Comedy Singles night. Considering this is an Irish bar I am somewhat disheartened to have my two water bottles (one of them brimming with home concocted Gin and Tonic) confiscated at the door. However, the drinks are somewhat reasonably priced for London alcohol prices. Approx £24 bought me a cheeseburger and chips and a bottle of wine.
After introductions and eating we all proceeded upstairs where my hand is stamped and I am furnished with a groanworthy joke (My girlfriend complains I never buy her flowers. I didnt even know she sold flowers) in exchange for my event voucher.
Function seats are set out in the room facing the stage 'assembly fashion' and a few people are already in them, but most are floating around and quite rightly mingling. My friends are hopeless and I am the worst of them, so for the first 30 minutes we stick together and frankly people started being too blurry to entirely trust halfway through my second bottle of wine so I am content to do so.
When it is time for the comedy to start we find our way to the seats. Gemma wants to sit at the back. Denzil wants to sit at the front. Frankly I want to stay at the bar, so I like to think I provided a fairly equal opportunities misery throughout by finding us central seats precisely 3 rows from the front and the back. The first performer is a bit to 'heckly' for my tastes, but at least he reserves his attention for the boisterous crowd of girls in front who appear to enjoy that kind of attention. When we are released for the intermission we are encouraged to find people who have a joke of the same colour (mine is red. Gemma's is blue. Both are terrible) and share it. This of course sparks off 'other terrible jokes' contests with anyone you happen to share them with, so it actually works pretty well for stirring engagement.
Back in the seats for the second act. It's a woman. Not heckly, which is good. I didn't find her as funny, but that's no reflection on her, really. I'm now buzzing from wine and I've had Steppenwolf's 'Magic Carpet Ride' stuck in my head since seeing 'sound machine' written on someones bag. Or badge. Or coaster. Or maybe it just popped in there, I dont know, whatever...!
This time we are sent out on the floor to tell people what our worst chat up lines were, and invited to write down the absolute worst of them for the staff in for the chance to win a free meal for two. By the time I get back from the bathroom Denzil has initiated himself amidst a group of blondes (well done that man) and Gemma is smiling at a man who is smiling back at her. So I find the only group that doesnt consist of at least 50% women and find myself talking to the comedians and attendants. It's school all over again, and here I am talking to the Dinner Ladies in my lunch break.
At least the conversation is amusing. Too bad I cant remember it.
Neither did I remember to write down my 'Does this cloth smell like Rohypnol to you?' pulling line. Fuck! That would have been a winner, given what the winner actually turned out to be.
Back in our seats. Gemma's gone. A check-up phonecall confirms that she has been kicked out for pushing away a dude who got too handsy.
Before I call anyone at the venue to account for this, the next day's phonecall presented the possibility that he 'might' have just fallen into her and additionally he 'might' have been disabled, so... *facepalm* I am sorry. As a non-blood-relative I can't hold myself reasonably accountable for her existence, but I certainly do accept some share of it in that since I started inviting her to these events she has had opportunity to meet and assault a wider demographic of people.
But having been reassured that Gemma is safely in an uber home I return to my seat to find the funniest comedian of the night just finishing his set. For the third and final time we are all released out onto the floor to mingle. Denzil buys me a pint which I drop within 2 minutes of possession. It's probably time to stop. Somehow I wind up with the phone number of a feller who is intrigued to know why my mate got kicked out. So that's a fun conversation the next day.
Actually, very fun night. £20 full price tickets. Definitely worth the £10 for the wowcher deal I got. £20 might have been worth it if a free drink had been thrown in but I feel the acts were a bit short and the alcohol a bit expensive to make it an ideal price for me.
Fun night out though. Definitely recommended.
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